In Bible, mentioned that one way to follow Jesus is to live in denial. Denial in this context is refuse temptations of carnal lust for seeking God’s kingdom. This sounds burdensome, but with God, nothing’s impossible and everything we will pass through it.
In life, denial is a decision that was quite heavy. How you’re really in a big desire and wanting of something but you have the decline those feelings. However, human has limit in denying. Someone said, live with yourself, be happy with yourself, live in truth. Where one of the meanings implied in this case is to be honest to yourself and others. But what if honesty is not in a proper condition? Or may be practically better not to show it as it is, denial. This is a great dilemma in life. On the one hand you want to live freely without pretense, but on the other hand everything seems suppress you to not show everything. Denial.
I continue to live in denial. Not because I didn’t dare to take risks or what, I just don’t want to be selfish and a burden to others. Actually this is all due to my childhood, since I was a kid I used to bear everything all by myself, and always tried to be tough, for surely no one can be your place to rely unless the Lord Jesus. I’d learned this, even though we live together with others but we can’t rely on anyone as well. Painful indeed living in denial, trying to not be honest to ourselves for the common goodness. But well, C’est la vie :’)